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LOSE WEIGHT NATURALLY BY WATER

Water therapy for weight loss works! Besides being a basic need for life, water also helps to maintain good health. It helps to cleanse your body and improves your body’s metabolism.

It is believed that water is the only natural resource that can speed up the weight loss process.

If you are considering water therapy for weight loss, you are sure to wonder just how it helps lose weight, how much you need to drink every day, amongst other considerations.

Here is an explanation of how water therapy for weight loss works.

How water therapy for weight loss works?

If you drink 17-18 glasses of water every day, it can improve the metabolic rate of your body by 40%.

This implies that you are burning calories at almost double the pace before implementing water therapy.

The main reason water helps you lose excess body weight is because it is directly linked to the body’s metabolism rate and the burning of body calories.

Water therapy not only fastens your weight loss process, but also improves the renal performance, reduces chances of kidney problems and helps to maintain a youthful and healthy skin.

Short answer... NO! You can't be gay for your attraction to transgendered women. 4 simple facts, and notes...

Fact: Gay men like penises
Please note: A particular amount of trans women will have negative emotions towards their male in-betweens.

Fact: Gay men often like hard/muscly/hairy bodies.
Please note: Transgendered women often have soft, curvy bodies because of the hormone reassigment therapy, and how it induces the female hormone, estrogen.

Fact: Gay men like men who identify as men, live completely as men, aside from the possible weekend drag gig, or similar, or alike.
Please note: Transgendered women have breasts, and gay men, while some are admirers of them, are not "into" boobs like straight men are.

Fact: Gay men are worshipers of the male form, and are not secretly straight. A true gay male is terrified by the sight of the female anatomy, and is not likely to engae a female sexually.
Please note: Trans women embody the feminine form, and do not resemble men, as we accept men.

The difference Between Gender and Sex?

Understanding the differences between gender, and sex is paramount if you are going to understand transgenderism. Firstly, transgenderism as a condition reflects the truth that gender, and sex by any kind of comparison are not nearly the same thing.

Gender Identity & Transgenderism

Gender identity is the minds conception of the body's sex. When the minds gender is not inline with the body's sex, we find the anomaly of "transgenderism" in play.

One might look at gender identity in the sense that it is steadfast to the state of the genitals, and that if you have a penis, you are by gender, a man. And if you have a vagina, you are by gender, a woman.

The anomaly of transgenderism puts doubt to this as factual. Gender is not controlled consciously with decisions. It is born to us biologically, and our surroundings do not effect how it manifests... It just does...much like different eye colour, and so on.

That being said, one must come to the ultimate conclusion that transgenderism is a natural occurrence within the gender/sex spectrum, and is not some delirious attempt at living contrary to ones sex.

Biological Sex & Transgenderism

Sex, in the descriptive sense, speaks about ones physicality concerning biology, and genitalia. Sex does not, as previously founded, determine the gender of a person 100% of the time... thought for the most part, it will.

Sex speaks very much so about the physical state of ones genitals, and chromosomal biology. And while it is commonly acquainted with one, or the other genders, it does not biologically determine how a persons gender identity will manifest.


In conclusion, this article attempts to explain the difference between sex, and gender in contrast to transgenderism. Knowing the difference between these two things is of the highest value concerning the understanding of transgenderism. Without understanding the difference between these two things, you will all be assuming that a penis makes a man, as a vagina makes a woman, and this is why this is such simple, but nevertheless important information for all those effected by transgenderism in anyway.

How To Support a Friend Through Transition?

So you have a friend who is about to begin transition, and you're not sure how to best support them during this time. Often, the biggest assumption that is made about transition is that it will change the person, and who they are. And to some extent this is true, but the overall character of the friend you love, and adore will remain unaltered. Following are some things to keep in mind while they are transitioning:

1. Be Aware You may be beyond this point by the time your friend begins transition, but remember to always be aware, and empathetic to the sensitivity of the subject of their transition, if need be. Everyone reacts differently, with different levels of sensitivity, so do your best to accommodate your friends sensitivity level.

2. Be Patient While this obviously goes unexpected, there may be times when your friend is struggling through their transition, and needs reaffirming and at times a friendly pep talk. Emotions can become erratic when HRT goes fulltime, so try to be understanding, and patient with your friend, if need be.

3. Support, and Love Unconditionally If you are close friends, then you are the greatest strength a person can have through transition. Showing your friend unconditional love and support will go far to ease the feelings of rejection, and self-doubt they may feel while in the early stages of transition. It is a trying time of learning, and will often be accompanied by a sense of failure when times get tough. So being an unconditional supporter of your friend is the best way to help them through these early stages of learning.

4. Give Constructive Criticism Being a friend, you have the ability to be honest, and being able to do so with little offense taken. If you are a woman, and your friend is also a woman(MTF)(or you are a man and your friend is also a man(FTM)), then you are in a good position of authority to help direct your friend in areas of dress and presentation, where they may seemingly fail. If you think you can help your friend through transition by giving them constructive criticism, then you are a real friend... with real benefits... because constructive criticism is the stuff that grows people, and helps them to advance, with a soft push in the right direction.

5. Show Complete Acceptance Showing your friend that you accept them completely, will help them to be more comfortable with your feedback, and also boost their morale, and self-esteem. If you can be accepting, supporting, patient, loving, and critical in times when needed, then you prove yourself not only to be a good friend, but also a person of much consideration, humility, and an overall stellar character. There is much involved along the path of being an observer of a friend's transition, more than what can be spoken about here... but following these simple guidelines may help you to be as good a friend as possible.. the rest will be found in your experiences and history.

How to Find and Date Transgendered Women?

I am pretty surprised how many times I get asked this, simply because, well... I assume men who want to date trans women, go through all of the usual avenues such as GLBT dating sites and the such, in order to find them.

But then it dawned on me... A vast amjority of trans women(including myself) shun such places, and are more likely to be found on open dating sites, social networks, and other forums identifying as women, and not trans women.

Another factor that will make finding trans women difficult, is that a fair few of them will be living, and dating in stealth... living away from, or even in denial of their trans history.

SO...where does that leave you if you are specifically seeking a trans partner? Here are some other options, and ways in which you can increase your chances of meeting and mingling with trans women:

Where to find transgendered women

• Transgender Forum Boards: You will find a few quality forums around that have specific sub-forums for dating, and posting "seeking" notices. Tip: Be respectful in these places, any anti-trans or overtly sexual, or other inappropriate behavior will usually get you banned.


• Open Dating Sites: As previously mentioned, trans women are more likely to be identifying as women and using open dating sites, social network apps, and anywhere where you might find genetic women doing the same thing. Tip: Doing a search on the site for the words trans, transgendered, transsexualmay procure some desirable results.


• Social Networks: Utilizing the internet social phenomenon more than anyone is the transgendered community. Isolation has been long associated with being transgendered, and the internet has helped give cure to that. You will find trans women mingling on sites like myspace, facebook, and youtube.Tip:Doing a search on the site for the words trans, transgendered, transsexual will help you locate groups associated with transgenderism/transsexuality.
  

How to a approach trans women once you have found one

Chances are, that if you managed to find a trans woman, that she is happy for you to. Just remember that on your approach, you should consider a few things before you make any advance:

• 1. Remember as a first rule that trans women are just like genetic women mentally/emotionally/physically.


• 2. Initially, you will want to approach a trans woman as you would any other woman you are interested in. With respect, decency, consideration.


• 3. If you do not consider her "trans-ness" a problem, then there is no need to bring it up.


• 4. Find out her interests, and learn more about her. She will appreciate your want to know about her life, aside from her condition.


• 5. If it does come up, be considerate as to how you address her gender/sex/surgical state, and know that it is probably discomforting for her to even think about it, let alone talk about it.


• A fair few trans women will be on the "chaser" alert, and may be turned off by advances of sex.


• Mostly, treat her as you would any other person, no more, and no less. I for one am put off by anyone flattering me because of my trans history, or treating me ANY different because of this, whether it might be with good intentions, or not.
  

Google Wants to Manage Your Online Identity - Will You Let It?

Let’s be honest now: We've all Google-d ourselves at some point or another in our lives. Be it for vanity’s sake or to protect your online identity, it’s always good to see what people are saying about you online.

The new ‘Me on the Web’ feature on the Google Dashboard now makes this easier. All you need to do is set up a Google profile. You will then be notified about hits from the data points on your profile, like your name and email.

“Your online identity is determined not only by what you post, but also by what others post about you — whether a mention in a blog post, a photo tag or a reply to a public status update,” Googleexplains.

A similar feature has long been available by customizing searches with alerts. Now, it takes fewer clicks.

Along with the feature, Google has also helpfully put together some resources on how to manage your online reputation and remove a site from Google’s search results.

This is useful in ensuring that personal or embarrassing information are not floating around on the web.

However, skeptics believe that this move proves Facebook’s claims that Google has been secretly collecting information about its users without their knowledge.

“It seems less about tell you what Google knows about you from the web and more about helping Google understand who you are on the web”, said Danny Sullivan.

Regardless of whether Google is trying to hurt or harm, it’s always good to remember to practice caution when we go about our activities online. Especially when submitting personal information.

REVEALED: What sugar actually does to your brain and body

Sugar is a sweet, funny thing. For some of us, it’s a love-hate affair that borders around obsession, caution and indulgence. To others, it’s merely just glucose and/or fructose; have too much of it and you get diabetes. Regardless of which group you belong to, you probably can’t avoid having sugar in your diet, so it’s always a good idea to understand better what you eating. Perhaps after reading this entry, you’ll find that sugar isn’t as bad as you had imagined – or possibly much worse than you believe.

Firstly, we should understand that sugar is a very broad term describing different forms of saccharides, of which glucose and fructose are of most direct concern to us. Glucose is what you should consider the natural “fuel” of your body, and that most bodily processes, such as thinking about an exam question or doing push-ups, require glucose in one way or another. Despite so, glucose has its own problems, namely leading to the release of VLDL which in higher amounts, could be a risk factor for cardiovascular disease. And then there is the all-too familiar diabetes of course.

Fructose on the other hand, is really just very bad. The body doesn’t require fructose for energy consumption, but will actively do so when its freely flowing in your bloodstream after a fructose-heavy meal. The main difference between this and glucose is that fructose affects your metabolism in more than one negative way, encompassing the release of more VLDL in addition to uric acid production and a whole bunch of other nasty stuff. Bottom is clear: glucose can be bad, whereas fructose can very bad when both are taken in copious amounts.

How does knowledge of fructose, glucose and the scientific stuff affect us? A majority of processed food rely on fructose to get you that tasty flavour, which means that you take in a lot of fructose when you indulge in junk food often. We’re not just talking about hamburgers, potato chips and the like, but also elusive softdrinks that can creep in your life quite sinisterly. Working in the office OT and feeling a little tired? Not a big deal. Simply reach out to the pantry fridge and grab yourself a 7-up. You know how the story goes, so watch out for these moments.

Aside from processed foods, fresh fruits are actually another easy to acquire fructose. Sounds bad? Not exactly. Although fruits contain high fructose, an inherently high fibre content in most of them (like bananas and papayas) informs your brain that satiety is met. Since hunger is disposed of, there isn’t a need for eating anymore, so any further fructose intake is thereby controlled. Besides, fruits are a primary source of vitamins so there is absolutely no reason to cut down on it. Cut away the soda drinks and desserts if you must.

Now that you have a better idea of the magical workings of sugar and especially fructose, how do you deal with it on a day to day basis? To save you from cracking your brains, we have some advice for you:

• Stay away from processed foods and especially soft drinks as much as possible
• Avoid sitting for too long; stand up and walk around a little every hour
• Have a few “sugar” days a week to avoid withdrawal symptoms
• Replace Dessert with something like fresh fruits or fruit juice

Sugar isn’t necessarily bad when taken in higher amounts, as glucose and fructose can boost sporting performances and even give your brain an energy lift (the brain favors glucose as an energy fuel) when you’re falling asleep in class. Just remember that like all things, sugar should taken in moderation.

Follow these simple tips and you’ll be on track to a healthy sugar life. It’s inevitable that you’ll eat sugar all the time so don’t be paranoid consuming sugar regularly in your diet. Instead, focus on how you can reduce sugar intake and watch out for those that are rich in fructose.

GG vs. TG

Who says that being a TG cant have fun with good Genetic Girl friends.. anyway some people don't actually realize who is Who .. hehehe

Living a christian life as a transgender can be difficult sometimes, because in attending church activities and other faithful rituals, you really need to conform with the public norms and as what the public want you to be, not that way you want it to be you. We are still in the phase of age where we cannot have our individuality. Its kinda sad but that is the ordained reality.

BEAUTY WITH A CAUSE ( HIV/AIDS AWARENESS)

THE transgenders community in Cebu last December conducted a beauty pageant in the Cebu City Hall Ground, with purpose of letting the public about how we transgender and the LGBT community wanted to share in informing the public on how to help educate the people especially the youth to avoid or prevent HIV / AIDS.

A WARNING FOR THOSE CONSIDERING MtF SRS:

A WARNING FOR THOSE CONSIDERING MtF SRS:

What if you "succeed" in completing a TS transition,

but did it for the wrong reasons?

Yep, you get the idea!

This is one place you do NOT want to go!

Deutsch, Español, Français (new), עברית (Hebrew), Português, Русский

In the large majority of cases, transsexual (TS) transitions work out well over the long-term, as we've seen in the many stories documented in Lynn'sTranssexual Women's Successes page. However, in some cases a complete TS transition may totally fail to meet very unrealistic expectations, and way too late the transitioner may realize that undergoing sex reassignment surgery (SRS) was a BIG mistake.

In Lynn's TS Informational pages, we discussed some of the social risks that face TG and TS transitioners. In the SRS information page, we discussed some of the medical risks of the surgery itself. Here in this page, we focus on the risks involved in undergoing SRS in cases where the overall rationale for transition and/or for undergoing SRS is questionable.

Some examples of "wrong reasons" and wrong situations for undergoing SRS are (i) efforts to become a center of attention and live a "sexy life", (ii) thinking it will "automatically turn oneself into a woman" in others' eyes, (iii) deciding to become a woman on a whim (for example, in the midst of a mid-life crisis), (iv) doing it for autosexual "thrills", (v) doing it while suffering from preexisting serious mental conditions unrelated to GID (depression, bi-polar conditions,...), etc.

Regrets and adjustment difficulties seem to occur especially frequently in the cases of older intense crossdressers and sexual fetishists whose drive to transition is based primarily on male sexual feelings and habits. These individuals will gradually lose their male libidinous responses to their new female body as time passes after the removal of their testicles during SRS. This loss of libidinous rewards, combined with accumulating practical, social and emotional difficulties in postoperative life, can lead to serious long-term adjustment difficulties for those who've "made a mistake". (This effect is quite different from the experiencing of a heightened female libido and improvements in lovemaking capability that occur in many other postoperative TS cases).

The bottom line here is that EXTREME CAUTION is advised if you are unsure of your motives for SRS.

Examples of cases of "regrets":

Following are stories of people who have experienced regrets and have openly talked about their particular regrets. We can learn a lot from such cases, which help clarify the nature and validity of this serious warning:

Renée Richards

Dani Bunten Berry

Sandra MacDougall

Samantha Kane

Summary

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Renée Richards

First consider the case of Renée Richards, who transitioned and had SRS in 1975 at age 40, and who was widely outed the next year as the "transsexual tennis player". Renee's story was widely reported in the media, and her story initially did a lot of good by announcing to a new generation of young TS girls that "sex change was possible", just as Christine Jorgensen's case had done in the mid-1950's. In 1983, she went on to write an autobiography about her transition entitled "Second Serve", which stimulated further notoriety about her situation and about transsexualism in general, especially regarding whether postop women should be allowed to participate as women in competitive sports.

Unfortunately, the extensive publicity about Renée's "sex change", publicity which she largely brought on herself, generated a widespread public image of her as a "transsexual" rather than a woman. The mystique surrounding her case widely propagated the image that postop women are not women after all, but are instead whatever "Renée Richards" is.

Part of Renée's problem with public acceptance, and possibly (though unconsciously) with her own inner self-acceptance, was undoubtedly her unusual facial structure. She had a very feminine, well-toned and attractive body, and must have thought of herself as being very beautiful. She sought media attention at every turn, and her photos were widely disseminated. Unfortunately, she never seemed to realize that she had a very prominent male brow-bulge and large male jaw and chin. Back in the 1970's and 80's, few transsexual women were aware that such features gave off powerful male gender cues, causing unease in other people without those people quite knowing why they felt this reaction (this awareness developed much later, in the 1990's, as people saw the dramatic before/after results of Douglas Ousterhout's pioneering facial feminization;surgeries).

For whatever reasons, including the sports-based notoriety surrounding her name - combined with the wide dissemination of her photographs - people always seemed to think of Renée as a "transsexual" rather than as a woman. This was unlike the situations that had faced other widely known postop women such as Christine Jorgensen and April Ashley, who although facing problems of discrimination were nevertheless quite generally thought of and reacted to as women by most folks, even in those early days.

In the end this may have become a major problem for Renée. Or perhaps as the media attention faded and as social, relational, emotional and physical realities set in, her hopes for an unendingly sexy, exciting life as a center of attention faded too. Whatever the reason, her transition failed to meet even her own expectations, and Renée now acknowledges that she wishes that she had NOT undergone a sex change.

Renée Richards "It's not something for somebody in their 40s to do, someone who's had a life as a man, - - - If you're 18 or 20 and never had the kind of (advantages) I had, and you're oriented in that direction, sure, go ahead and make right what nature didn't. But if you're a 45-year-old man and you're an airline pilot and you have an ex-wife and three adolescent kids, you better get on Thorazine or Zoloft or Prozac or get locked up or do whatever it takes to keep you from being allowed to do something like this.'' - Renée Richards, Associated Press, February 1999. "I wish that there could have been an alternative way, but there wasn't in 1975. If there was a drug that I could have taken that would have reduced the pressure, I would have been better off staying the way I was -- a totally intact person. I know deep down that I'm a second-class woman. I get a lot of inquiries from would-be transsexuals, but I don't want anyone to hold me out as an example to follow. Today there are better choices, including medication, for dealing with the compulsion to crossdress and the depression that comes from gender confusion. As far as being fulfilled as a woman, I'm not as fulfilled as I dreamed of being. I get a lot of letters from people who are considering having this operation...and I discourage them all." - Renée Richards, "The Liason Legacy", Tennis Magazine, March 1999. "She calls the 2004 decision of the International Olympic Committee, which allows transsexuals to compete, “a particularly stupid decision"" . . . "Better to be an intact man functioning with 100 percent capacity for everything than to be a transsexual woman who is an imperfect woman.”" - Renée Richards, as quoted in "The Lady Regrets", New York Times, February 1, 2007

There may also have been even deeper issues in Renée's case, as we learn from her autobiography. Renée had been a long-term intense crossdresser, and had gone back and forth about whether to transition. In one early phase, she went on hormones. Then as self-doubts began to set in, she detransitioned off of hormones and even had her new breasts surgically removed!

Furthermore, Richards had also met with a number of young postop women in Paris, and they had all warned her against transitioning. Those girls confirmed that they themselves were happy being complete women. However, they told her that there were "others who were not so lucky". They told her about "one who was not ready, who did not have the true feminine nature" and who "after the surgery went mad".

In her book Renee says "Then I knew that this was all for my benefit", i.e., that those girls were trying to warn her against transitioning. However, she went on to do it anyways, and ended up having serious regrets.

Unfortunately, Richards now generalizes from her own sad experience and now proclaims that NO one in their 40's or older should transition. Readers should be aware that Richards is totally out of contact with the large community of successful postop women, and has no clue that many later transitioners actually do very well. It is sad to see her generalize in this sweeping way about late transitioners, and to do so in ignorance of the many successes out there.

Nevertheless, Richards' case is a good warning for some older transitioners to consider.

We can speculate further about what might have gone wrong in Renée's case, and better visualize how mistakes can be made, by reading about a more recent case of an intense crossdresser who underwent transsexual transition. Carefully consider the following essay by Dani Bunten Berry, a prominent computer game designer who underwent transsexual transition in 1992 at the age of 43:

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Dani Bunten Berry

The following essay by Dani is contained in a memorial website about her career and her gender transition. Dani was a wonderful gal who took full responsibility for her actions and didn't blame (although she questions) others for what happened to her. Her essay contains her own honest and heartfelt words of advice to others who might be inclined to undergo SRS for the wrong reasons, as she did.

Dani was a computer scientist, and was the pioneer of multi-player computer games. She was widely known and greatly respected as a major innovator in her field. Multi-player computer games have become an underpinning for much of modern computer-collaboration technology, and thus her work has had a great impact on computing in general. For more about Dani, see the March 18, 2003 Salon.com article about Dani and her creative work.

Even though Dani's gender transition went too far in her case, she bravely made the best of it afterwards and found some degree of peace. Sadly, she died of lung cancer in 1998 at the early age of 49, and is no longer here to speak with us directly. We owe Dani a huge debt for leaving us this very candid, deeply personal essay. By being so open and honest about her difficulties after having SRS, she can speak to others and pass on her words of caution long into the future.

Dani Bunten Berry [1949-1998] "Special Note to Those Thinking About a Sex Change, by Danielle Berry [Compiled from a number of emails I sent in response to requests for input from those considering their own change.] Don't do it! That's my advice. This is the most awful, most expensive, most painful, most disruptive thing you could ever do. Don't do it unless there is no other alternative. You may think your life is tough but unless it's a choice between suicide and a sex-change it will only get worse. And the costs keep coming. You lose control over most aspects of your life, become a second class citizen and all so you can wear women's clothes and feel cuter than you do now. Don't do it is all I've got to say. That's advice I wish someone had given me. I had the sex change, I "pass" fine, my career is good but you can't imagine the number of times I've wished I could go back and see if there was another way. Despite following the rules and being as honest as I could with the medical folks at each stage, nobody stopped me and said "Are you honest to God absolutely sure this is the ONLY path for you?!" To the contrary, the voices were all cheerfully supportive of my decision. I was fortunate that the web didn't exist then - there are too damn many cheerleaders ready to reassure themselves of their own decision by parading their "successful" surgeries and encouraging others. I can speak the transgender party line that I was a female trapped in a male body and I remember feeling this way since I was 4. But, it's never that easy if you look at it sincerely and without preconception. There's little question that a mid-life crisis, a divorce and a cancer scare were involved in at least the timing of my sex-change decision. To be completely honest at this point (3 yrs post-op) is not easy, however, I'm not sure I would do it again. I'm now concerned that much of what I took as a gender dysfunction might have been nothing more than a neurotic sexual obsession. I was a cross-dresser for all of my sexual life and had always fantasized going fem as an ultimate turn-on. Ironically, when I began hormone treatment my libido went away. However, I mistook that relief from sexual obsession for validation of my gender change. Then in the final bit of irony, after surgery my new genitals were non-orgasmic (like 80% of my TG sisters). So, needless to say, my life as a woman is not an ultimate turn-on. And what did it all cost? Over $30,000 and the loss of most of my relationships to family and friends. And the costs don't end. Every relationship I make now and in the future has to come to terms with the sex-change. And I'm not the only one who suffers. I hate the impact this will have on my kids and their future. Anyway, I'm making it sound awful and it's not. There are some perks but the important things like being comfortable with myself and having a true love in my life don't seem like they were contingent on the change. Being my "real self" could have included having a penis and including more femininity in whatever forms made sense. I didn't know that until too late and now I have to make the best of the life I've stumbled into. I just wish I would have tried more options before I jumped off the precipice. I miss my easy access to my kids (unlike many TS's I didn't completely lose access to them though), I miss my family and old friends (I know they "shouldn't" have abandoned me but lots of folks aren't as open minded as they "should" be ... I still miss them) and finally, I hate the disconnect with my past (there's just no way to integrate the two unrelated lives). There's any number of ways to express your gender and sexuality and the only one I tried was the big one. I'll never know if I could have found a compromise that might have worked a lot better than the "one size fits all" sex-change. Please, check it out yourself before you do likewise." - Danielle Berry -

What we learn from Dani's candid essay is that both she and her counselors ignored, or were unaware of, key warning flags. She lost her (male) libido when she began taking estrogen, without any heightening of any female libidinous feelings. This was a predictor that she might possibly become inorgasmic postop. Her comments that CD's/TG's transition "so you can wear women's clothes and feel cuter than you do now" and that "I was a cross-dresser for all of my sexual life and had always fantasized going fem as an ultimate turn-on" reveal that her motive for transition was a male CD sexual turn-on. Her loss of orgasmic capability postop proved to be an especially cruel outcome of her search for an "ultimate turnon".

Dani was left with all the usual difficulties of gender transition, but gained none of the profound benefits felt by many postop women. This is an all-too-common result among the recent spate of late-onset transitions. Dani's guess that 80% of CD's/TG's end up inorgasmic IF they undergo SRS may be about right - whereas the reverse is likely true of those who are intensely TS (follow-ups indicate that a majority of early-transitioning TS's are orgasmic postop).

Dani would threfore have been much better advised by her counselors to undergo FFS to correct her very masculine facial structure and then quietly undertake a TG social transition. She could have taken hormones, undergone electrolysis, changed her social gender and name and ID's, and lived as a woman - but NOT had sex reassignment surgery. She would undoubtedly been far happier, and as a prettier woman would have encountered a better social reaction to her gender transition. She could have also continued to enjoy her male autosexual transvestic practices. Tragically, this option wasn't visualized and presented to her in 1992.

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Sandra MacDougall

The stories of Renee and Dani are not isolated instances. There have been many TS transition failures in recent years. Ever-increasing numbers of late-transitioning intense CD's and self-proclaimed "autogynephiles" are getting letters of consent from careless counselors and then unwisely undergo SRS, without being fully prepared to live as women and without having clear notions of the other options available to them.

For example, see the 4/28/02 Scotsman.com news story about Sandra (Ian) MacDougall (49), entitled the "Torment of sex change soldier trapped in a woman’s body" (more)

Sandra (Ian) MacDougall

"The former member of the Scots Guards says she has suffered verbal and physical abuse since her sex swap operation almost four years ago, and wishes it could be reversed. But MacDougall now finds herself trapped in a woman’s body after she consulted doctors and was told the operation could never be reversed. MacDougall, who has not had a relationship since going under the knife and expects to be celibate for the rest of her life, has now decided to make the best of her hard-won gender. She said: "Since I had the operation my life has been made a misery by people taunting me whenever I go out."

From the context of the article, it seems clear that Sandra is an intense CD (she has "more than 80 dresses, bags of makeup, and a whole cupboard full of shoes"). It is also clear that she (i) wasn't prepared or emotionally ready for social transition, (ii) had no idea how people were going to react to her afterwards given her lack of preparedness, and (iii) apparently somehow thought that undergoing SRS was going to magically do what she herself had not yet done by other means - i.e., change her social persona and apparent social gender to female.

As a result, her life has been totally miserable ever since undergoing SRS. She doesn't pass and everyone in her community makes fun of her. She never has, and never again will have, sex. She desperately wishes she "could go back", but there's no way to reverse the surgery.

Sandra's best option at this point might be to de-transition socially and hormonally (return to the male role and go back on testosterone), but she doesn't seem to be aware of that option either. Total transition failures of this type should serve as extreme warning signals to intensely fetishistic crossdressers (and to those who self-identify as "autogynephiles", i.e., as sexual paraphilics, according to their therapists) who are considering undergoing SRS.

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Samantha Kane

Then we have those who "change sex" on a whim and have the financial means to do so, then afterwards have regrets and sue everyone in sight who "did this to them" - while not taking any responsibility whatsoever for their own actions.

For example, consider the case of "Samantha Kane", and then think about the damage that this impulsive person has done to himself and about the harm he is now doing to trans women everywhere by his irresponsible actions - both in transitioning and then in lashing out as those who tried to help him in the first place.

(Sam Hashimi => Samantha Kane => Charles Kane)

"Sam, as he was"

"Samantha, as he erm was?"

"Charles, as he is today!!!"

"Samantha Kane was, by anyone's standards, a hugely successful woman. She ran her own interior design company; was independent, modern and extraordinarily beautiful. She had a top of-the-range Mercedes, homes in West London and Spain and accounts at Knightsbridge's most exclusive boutiques. Her name made her sound like a character in Dynasty - and her feline looks would certainly have qualified her to be one. She rubbed shoulders with the likes of the Crown Prince of Dubai, ran with the international set in Monte Carlo and Cannes and shared her bed with a number of fabulously wealthy men. But something inside Samantha hated being a woman. She found the conversation superficial and the sex second rate. She loathed shopping, disliked gossip and fretted over the endless maintenance of her face and figure. In short, Samantha Kane desperately missed being one of the boys. For Samantha used to be Sam, a millionaire with a property empire and a husband with two children. As Iraqi-born Sam Hashimi, he brokered million-dollar deals for Middle Eastern businessmen and flared briefly in newspapers when he launched an unsuccessful takeover bid for Sheffield United FC. Following the first Gulf War, Sam's business empire collapsed and his marriage ended. At 37, seemingly out of the blue, he decided to become a woman. He had a sex change operation in December 1997 and spent close to £60,000 on surgery - including £10,000 on genital surgery and £3,000 on breast implants. Within four years of the operation, Sam realised 'he'd' made a dreadful mistake and has begun the painful process of having more surgery to return to being a man again!. He was in the headlines again, claiming his sex change was 'an act against nature'. He has reported his doctor, consultant psychiatrist Russell Reid ... to the General Medical Council alleging he had a `cavalier attitude' in recommending him for the gender realignment surgery. He registered officially as Charles a month ago, wanting to put as much distance as he could between Sam and Samantha. He cuts a poignant figure of a man. Charles is dressed in a pin-stripe suit and pink tie - an amalgam of man and woman. His hands are soft with clean, shaped nails. He walks and sits in the manner of a woman, but uses the men's lavatories. He has no facial growth and little male muscle. He says it took four years of hormone treatment and surgery to feminise his body completely. It will take as much time again to return it to manhood. But Charles will never be as Sam was. His genitals will be re-constructed by plastic surgery. His body will never naturally produce testosterone and he will never again grow a beard. Charles cannot give a convincing reason for becoming a woman. He says he was suffering from a nervous breakdown when gender change was recommended and that he should have been referred for counselling not surgery. 'I was a traditional male. I was strong and tough in business and the provider for my family. My wife Trudi had never worked a day of her life. I shouldered the complete financial responsibility for her and the children,' he says. 'She'd think nothing of going shopping and spending a few thousand pounds on a dress. I always used to wonder what it would be like to be a woman, to have none of the responsibility I had, to have doors opened for me and have all the privileges a woman seems to have.' Until his breakdown, he was thoroughly heterosexual; a conventional, grey-suited businessman with short dark hair and a moustache. Born in Baghdad to middle-class parents, he moved to England at 17 where he secured an HND in engineering and married Trudi, a former beauty queen, at 23. He built a property empire, negotiated deals for wealthy Arabs and ran a club in Mayfair. At one time, he says, he had £2 million in the bank. 'I was like any other man,' he says. 'I worked hard and did pretty much what I liked. I enjoyed spending time with men talking about football, the stock market and, of course, girls. I think my sex drive was above average. I had one or two affairs during my marriage..."

================================= BBC1, Tuesday 19th October 2004 1035pm ================================= After the failure of his business and departure of his wife and children, Sam Hashimi took the drastic decision to undergo surgery to become a woman. It was only later that the ex-millionaire realised he had made a terrible mistake. As he prepares for the final stage of a sex-change reversal, Hashimi wonders if he will be accepted as a fully fledged male. Documentaries about people undergoing sex-reassignment are extremely common these days. But this one is quite extraordinary. It follows Samantha, a wealthy 44 year old property developer who was born a man (and as Sam was married for ten years and had two children), but who seven years ago had a sex-change operation. Now - and here's the twist - Samantha wants to become Charles and is on the brink of having another sex-change operation to turn her back into a male again. "I was robbed of my manhood for so many years" explains Sam/Samantha/Charles, ignoring the fact that it was his/her decision to undergo surgery. While Charles waits for the final bit of reconstructive surgery, we see him getting into an hysterical state about an expensive yacht he's buying (and which he hopes may help him find a girlfriend). In a way it's yet another example of how he rushes into things without thinking about the consequences. It's obvious that he's a complex person who's extremely confused about what he wants, but you'll still sit open-mouthed that anyone can make radical life-changing decisions like this on a whim. ====================================

For more information on this case, see:

http://www.transgenderzone.com/features/changemeback.htm

http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/tv_and_radio/onelife_prog3.shtml

For a more extensive discussion about cases of "regrets", and also about groups of religious zealots and anti-gay ideologues who sometimes prey on these cases - smothering them with attention to get them to suddenly de-transition and then sue everyone in sight - see Christine Beatty's page entitled Transsexualism, Regrets and "Reparative Therapy":

http://www.glamazon.net/transsexual-regrets.html

See also Joanne Herman's article "Transsexual Regret", The Advocate, March 13, 2007:

http://www.joanneherman.com/Trans_101_regret.html

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Summary:

It is clear that you must be very, very honest with yourself about "why" you need to transition, and whether a TS transition (including SRS) will meet your inner hopes, aspirations and expectations over the long term. No one else can know your inner feelings of "why you need to do this", and no one else can predict how competent you might be at doing this. It is VERY important to be brutally realistic with yourself about your motives, capabilities and expectations before committing to a complete transsexual transition. So do be careful and think long and hard about the above warnings.

Listen to your heart and to your body, and don't let perceived social pressures force you into something you'll regret. If you really enjoy your male sexuality preop (especially male "mounting, thrusting and penetrating" urges), then you are unlikely to develop and enjoy a female sexuality after a TS transition. Instead you may simply regret losing your male sexuality, and that will be such a turn-off that you may become sexually "cold". If you think this is a possibility, you should seriously consider TG social transition without undergoing SRS.

Furthermore, those at risk for very difficult social transitions should realize that SRS will not in and of itself somehow miraculously "make them a woman in other people's eyes". After all, the only people who see your genitalia are those whom you are intimate with (and your physicians, etc.) and thus SRS by itself will not affect the general reactions of those around you. In cases where serious difficulties are expected in social transition, it might be wise to give FFS priority over SRS, because FFS has a much more profound effect on the reactions of others to one's transition.

Suddenly transitioning and then undergoing SRS on a whim is an especially bad idea, no matter how much money, influence, or power one has with which to make it happen. Seek counseling instead. Learn about the alternatives. Slow it down. Listen to the advice of Dani Berry and reflect on the case of Samantha Kane above.

However, if you feel a very deep need to be a female in body-sex as well as in social-gender, and especially if you feel a deep need to fully express your female sensuality in intimacy and lovemaking, then transsexual transition and SRS may be right for you.

Lynn Conway

["SRS Warning" Version of 4-09-05; update of 3-16-07]

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